When people ask me how my summer run was, it's hard to put into words. Or, rather, it's hard to put into just a few words. I've been asked this question countless times since I've returned home, and I haven't quite perfected an answer yet. So, I thought the best way to answer that question was to blog about it, mostly because it will allow me endless words to talk about how incredible and life-changing this summer was. I often find that reflecting like this helps me process things, so I wanted to wait a while after 4K had ended before I tried to reflect on 4K in its entirety.
There are several feelings I'll admit to experiencing in the few weeks/months before 4K began: confused, nervous, unprepared, excited. Despite going to a training weekend retreat for directors back in January, there were still a lot of unknowns going into this summer. Since this is only the second year that the cross-country run has ever been done by 4K, in many ways, we were still the guinea pigs. There were some questions I had that just didn't have answers and that I would have to discover on my own. When I'm the leader of something, I like to be prepared and know that I have all the right answers, but this was a huge reality check that sometimes as a leader, you can't always have all those answers. Sometimes you have to make them yourself when you're forging a new trail (literally and figuratively).
As I think back to the few days before our trip left, I have to laugh because I remember how incredibly awkward it was to be meeting my teammates for the first time in real life. We were all unsure of one another, not quite positive how we should act or what we should say. Luckily that went away within the first 24 hours we all spent together.
I also think back to the night I arrived for our tribute dinner and Nicole pulled me aside before I headed up to meet the group in Golden Gate Park. It was the evening of June 13, and Nicole shared with me that the 4K family had lost a rider that day. I stared blankly for a second, not recognizing what she had told me. She told me what had happened to Jamie Roberts, an amazing member of Team Portland who I wish I could have had the pleasure of knowing. With our run send-off just 2 days later, this was an enormous reminder for me as a director that many things out of our control can happen on these trips. I also knew that I would be determined to carry Jamie's spirit with our team as we ran across the country the opposite way that the bikes rode.
Send-off morning came and went in a flash. One minute I was waking up from my comfy hotel bed with my parents, the next I was dipping my heel into the Pacific Ocean and racing off toward the Golden Gate Bridge with my 25 new teammates. And so began the most rewarding summer of my life.
There are several feelings I'll admit to experiencing in the few weeks/months before 4K began: confused, nervous, unprepared, excited. Despite going to a training weekend retreat for directors back in January, there were still a lot of unknowns going into this summer. Since this is only the second year that the cross-country run has ever been done by 4K, in many ways, we were still the guinea pigs. There were some questions I had that just didn't have answers and that I would have to discover on my own. When I'm the leader of something, I like to be prepared and know that I have all the right answers, but this was a huge reality check that sometimes as a leader, you can't always have all those answers. Sometimes you have to make them yourself when you're forging a new trail (literally and figuratively).
As I think back to the few days before our trip left, I have to laugh because I remember how incredibly awkward it was to be meeting my teammates for the first time in real life. We were all unsure of one another, not quite positive how we should act or what we should say. Luckily that went away within the first 24 hours we all spent together.
I also think back to the night I arrived for our tribute dinner and Nicole pulled me aside before I headed up to meet the group in Golden Gate Park. It was the evening of June 13, and Nicole shared with me that the 4K family had lost a rider that day. I stared blankly for a second, not recognizing what she had told me. She told me what had happened to Jamie Roberts, an amazing member of Team Portland who I wish I could have had the pleasure of knowing. With our run send-off just 2 days later, this was an enormous reminder for me as a director that many things out of our control can happen on these trips. I also knew that I would be determined to carry Jamie's spirit with our team as we ran across the country the opposite way that the bikes rode.
Send-off morning came and went in a flash. One minute I was waking up from my comfy hotel bed with my parents, the next I was dipping my heel into the Pacific Ocean and racing off toward the Golden Gate Bridge with my 25 new teammates. And so began the most rewarding summer of my life.
I'm hoping that if you're reading this blog post, you probably read at least some of my posts from the 4K this summer. If so, you know what the 4K life was like: wale up early every day, do chores, run a long time, get to host, shower, eat, sleep, repeat. As monotonous as it sounds, there was some sort of comfort in the simplicity of this routine. Our biggest concern for each day was whether we'd have wifi or dinner provided at our host that night.
However, of course, no day went as planned. We faced all kinds of wild challenges throughout the summer, from a flat tire to a van stuck in the mud to a van leaking oil/gas all over the side of an interstate and much more. For some reason, I seemed to be stuck in the midst of every semi-crisis that happened on 4K. Eventually, I just started to laugh when something went wrong. After all, nothing that happened was that bad, we were able to work through all the little bumps in the road and looking back, it's all pretty funny.
During 4K, it was difficult to see the impact that our team had. When you wake up early every day, when you're constantly exhausted, when your patience has worn thin and when you always have some kind of soreness/pain from running, you often times lose sight of what the bigger picture is. Our team pow wows and daily dedication circles helped me refocus from time to time, but still I sometimes couldn't quite grasp the impact of our summer.
Now that I've had time to look back on all of 4K, my blogs, my photos and the countless comments from friends and family who supported me, it's evident just how many lives we touched. Ulman's phrase for 4K is "Cancer changes lives, so do we!" And it's true; cancer sucks, but nobody has to experience it alone.
I think back to all the random strangers who stopped on the side of a road, in a parking lot, at a gas station, in a host town, to ask what we're doing and thank us endlessly for it. I think back to those strangers who even offered to share some of their own personal connections to cancer with us. I think back to every photo I posted of who I had dedicated each day to and the comments of gratitude and thanks from the family member or friend who shared that person's name with me. I think back to the two scholarships we gave away to young adults affected by cancer, to the two hospital visits we did and to the afternoon spent at Ronald McDonald House of Columbus, OH. I think back to the gracious hosts who wanted to make sure we had absolutely everything we needed so we were comfortable and cared for because they were so thankful for what we were doing this summer.
I think back to each individual who felt our impact in some way from the 4K, and it's overwhelming. Additionally, the $160,000+ that my run team raised will make an enormous difference in the lives of young adults with cancer. I couldn't even begin to count how many people whose lives were touched in some way this summer. It's an incredibly humbling and rewarding feeling that renewed my passion for doing good in life and reminded me why that's so important to me.
However, of course, no day went as planned. We faced all kinds of wild challenges throughout the summer, from a flat tire to a van stuck in the mud to a van leaking oil/gas all over the side of an interstate and much more. For some reason, I seemed to be stuck in the midst of every semi-crisis that happened on 4K. Eventually, I just started to laugh when something went wrong. After all, nothing that happened was that bad, we were able to work through all the little bumps in the road and looking back, it's all pretty funny.
During 4K, it was difficult to see the impact that our team had. When you wake up early every day, when you're constantly exhausted, when your patience has worn thin and when you always have some kind of soreness/pain from running, you often times lose sight of what the bigger picture is. Our team pow wows and daily dedication circles helped me refocus from time to time, but still I sometimes couldn't quite grasp the impact of our summer.
Now that I've had time to look back on all of 4K, my blogs, my photos and the countless comments from friends and family who supported me, it's evident just how many lives we touched. Ulman's phrase for 4K is "Cancer changes lives, so do we!" And it's true; cancer sucks, but nobody has to experience it alone.
I think back to all the random strangers who stopped on the side of a road, in a parking lot, at a gas station, in a host town, to ask what we're doing and thank us endlessly for it. I think back to those strangers who even offered to share some of their own personal connections to cancer with us. I think back to every photo I posted of who I had dedicated each day to and the comments of gratitude and thanks from the family member or friend who shared that person's name with me. I think back to the two scholarships we gave away to young adults affected by cancer, to the two hospital visits we did and to the afternoon spent at Ronald McDonald House of Columbus, OH. I think back to the gracious hosts who wanted to make sure we had absolutely everything we needed so we were comfortable and cared for because they were so thankful for what we were doing this summer.
I think back to each individual who felt our impact in some way from the 4K, and it's overwhelming. Additionally, the $160,000+ that my run team raised will make an enormous difference in the lives of young adults with cancer. I couldn't even begin to count how many people whose lives were touched in some way this summer. It's an incredibly humbling and rewarding feeling that renewed my passion for doing good in life and reminded me why that's so important to me.
On the flip side, I also can't count the number of people who touched MY life this summer. All of the people I listed above had such a great impact on me and reminded me of 4K's mission. In addition, my 25 amazing, crazy, wild, funny, caring, passionate, determined teammates had perhaps the biggest impact on me.
You don't realize how much you can grow to know a group of people until you spend 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, for 6 weeks straight with them. There really wasn't anywhere to hide from everyone else this summer, and privacy and alone-time were things that just didn't exist. At times, that could be frustrating when you've had a long day and you're tired of being around a big crowd, but for the most part, it was always an adventure to hang out with my teammates.
I have the greatest memories of the trip thanks to my teammates. They are a hilarious bunch of weirdos, and I can't imagine spending this summer with anyone else. Whether we were having wild dance parties outside the vans, singing along to our favorite (often times depressing Sam Smith) songs, enjoying the great outdoors......., or spending way too many hours together in our vans, I loved every moment of being with them. There are certain songs, phrases and objects that will forever remind me of my 4K team.
It's evident how much we love each other because although the run ended a week and a half ago, our GroupMe group texting app hasn't quit buzzing since we parted ways. Every day all day, we text each other to reminisce about 4K memories, complain about how lonely we are and muse about how weird it was to readjust to "normal" life post-4K.
Adjusting back to "normal" life was hard; I missed sleeping on the floor, the chorus of cell phone alarms going off simultaneously way too early in the mooring and the chorus of sleeping pads deflating that followed, wearing my hair up and running clothes every day, not caring how anyone looked, living out of a duffle bag and 4 white vans, running with people who became some of my best friends. It was certainly strange coming back to all the comforts of home, and it was especially unsettling to come home to the doctor appointment I had the Monday after 4K.
You don't realize how much you can grow to know a group of people until you spend 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, for 6 weeks straight with them. There really wasn't anywhere to hide from everyone else this summer, and privacy and alone-time were things that just didn't exist. At times, that could be frustrating when you've had a long day and you're tired of being around a big crowd, but for the most part, it was always an adventure to hang out with my teammates.
I have the greatest memories of the trip thanks to my teammates. They are a hilarious bunch of weirdos, and I can't imagine spending this summer with anyone else. Whether we were having wild dance parties outside the vans, singing along to our favorite (often times depressing Sam Smith) songs, enjoying the great outdoors......., or spending way too many hours together in our vans, I loved every moment of being with them. There are certain songs, phrases and objects that will forever remind me of my 4K team.
It's evident how much we love each other because although the run ended a week and a half ago, our GroupMe group texting app hasn't quit buzzing since we parted ways. Every day all day, we text each other to reminisce about 4K memories, complain about how lonely we are and muse about how weird it was to readjust to "normal" life post-4K.
Adjusting back to "normal" life was hard; I missed sleeping on the floor, the chorus of cell phone alarms going off simultaneously way too early in the mooring and the chorus of sleeping pads deflating that followed, wearing my hair up and running clothes every day, not caring how anyone looked, living out of a duffle bag and 4 white vans, running with people who became some of my best friends. It was certainly strange coming back to all the comforts of home, and it was especially unsettling to come home to the doctor appointment I had the Monday after 4K.
I had scheduled a dermatologist appointment that Monday to get a strange scar on my shoulder checked out. Much to my dismay, I ended up having to get a biopsy because there was the possibility that I had a rare type of skin cancer. It was an alarming wake-up call and a strange irony: coming back from running across America for young adults with cancer to find out that I could be a young adult with cancer. It seemed like the longest day and a half after that biopsy waiting for results to come back. In that moment, I was so thankful for the support of my team, whom I texted right after the biopsy and received a ton of love and prayers from. Just another reason that I love these 25 people more than anything. Thankfully, the results came back relatively quickly and there was no cancer, just a weird scar that needs steroid shots to fix. I'm glad to have that settled and taken care of now, but it was yet another poignant reminder of the importance of 4K and my summer.
This summer was about a lot of things. It was about a little bit about running, but mostly about meeting new people, building relationships, spreading awareness for young adults with cancer, helping Jamie Roberts get all her miles in to finish her journey that was cut short and doing good everywhere we went. This summer renewed my faith in humanity, my adventurous spirit and my love for making others happy. It was a summer of lives changing and a summer of renewal.
I still can't exactly bring myself to terms with the fact that my 4K summer is over. 42 days went by entirely too fast, and I would happily go back to the 4K life with my teammates in a heartbeat. Unfortunately, though, the summer is ending. I'm closing another amazing chapter in my book, one that I will never forget as long as I live. I guess now it's time for me to figure out my next big adventure, and I have a sneaking suspicion that a few of my 4K teammates will be included in whatever big adventure comes next in my life.
Run happy,
Natalie
This summer was about a lot of things. It was about a little bit about running, but mostly about meeting new people, building relationships, spreading awareness for young adults with cancer, helping Jamie Roberts get all her miles in to finish her journey that was cut short and doing good everywhere we went. This summer renewed my faith in humanity, my adventurous spirit and my love for making others happy. It was a summer of lives changing and a summer of renewal.
I still can't exactly bring myself to terms with the fact that my 4K summer is over. 42 days went by entirely too fast, and I would happily go back to the 4K life with my teammates in a heartbeat. Unfortunately, though, the summer is ending. I'm closing another amazing chapter in my book, one that I will never forget as long as I live. I guess now it's time for me to figure out my next big adventure, and I have a sneaking suspicion that a few of my 4K teammates will be included in whatever big adventure comes next in my life.
Run happy,
Natalie